An 3-Step Guide to Maiming Your Child:
1. Finger-paint.
2. Take child's dirty hand and lead child to sink.
3. Pull child away from tub ("A bath is hardly necessary, son.") and onto stool by sink.*
*It is crucial that you do this by pulling upwards on his/her forearm... otherwise trauma is not guaranteed.
That's pretty much it! The result will be a crying, arm-holding child who repeats over and over the heart-wrenching cry, "Herchoo? Herchoo?" (Hurt you... as in what I asked just minutes before... "What's the matter, baby? Did I hurt you??")
1. Finger-paint.
2. Take child's dirty hand and lead child to sink.
3. Pull child away from tub ("A bath is hardly necessary, son.") and onto stool by sink.*
*It is crucial that you do this by pulling upwards on his/her forearm... otherwise trauma is not guaranteed.
That's pretty much it! The result will be a crying, arm-holding child who repeats over and over the heart-wrenching cry, "Herchoo? Herchoo?" (Hurt you... as in what I asked just minutes before... "What's the matter, baby? Did I hurt you??")
He wouldn't use his left arm AT ALL (ie. clapped by hunching over to reach the dangling hand, manually lifted left hand with right hand in order to put both hands on table, etc.)
So sad. Instacare immediately followed. X-rays, the works. Insight learned? Nothin. Forty-eight hours later, a return visit. Still clueless, but let's slap a splint on him just in case. Five long days later, a visit to the orthopedic specialist. Splint removed. Tender but functioning arm remaining. Hooray!
It was a long week for all of us, needless to say. Here are some pictures (NOW- that I've semi-recovered and am able to post them without tearing up). He's okay now. We all are.
James in his V-day jammies (we'd had enough sugar).
*Note the limp left arm... he wasn't using it at all.
Sleeping beauty.... and again, limp arm.
But the fact that Bear became his pillow was adorable.
With his new "sah-soo" (dinosaur)... the splint and sling.
(Not to mention his oh-so-studly daddy!) 
The bread bag. Classic.
I just love this face. It seems to be too mature... kind of sarcastically saying, "Smooth, Mom, smooth."
14 comments:
Oh man! I thought you were joking and that the "instacare and x-rays" were some cutesy little thing you did to convince him that it didn't actually hurt. Poor James! It's cool though. Next time make sure it will give him a scar and then he can impress all the girls when he grows up. Hmmm... Yep. Definitely not ready to have kids.
So glad to hear he is doing better! Poor kid- who knew that something like that can happen with out much force! Cute little James he looks still adorable with his splint and all!
are we still on for this weekend?
by the way nice bra in the last photo!!!
Love the layout and the fact that baby James is better! So sad....but I can just picture him sitting on the back porch screaming for child protection services...ring a bell?! jk. LOVE YOU!
ps- my word verification was: holy g. huh?!
So sorry that happened. It is amazing how much pain and torture they can inflict on themselves and a simple act made my mom on the run turns into a major ordeal. Typical. Glad to know he is doing better.
yeah, i agree with brittney--nice bra! haha. i'm glad you didn't break my nephews arm. and he looks adorable in all the pictures (splint and all)...don't feel too bad about it...he didn't even look sad. =)
After reading the comments above mine, I went back to the original post, confused as to how I missed seeing a picture of James in a bra. Turns out it was just hanging from a chair. Boring. I expect to see a picture of James in a bra posted in the near future.
HA HA HA! I always thought Kona would be the first to be in the arm sling. Glad it's not me!! Seriously! How scary! And all just to be clean. . . kidding!
ps, after seeing Britt's comment about the bra, I was really hoping to see you in it. But alas, it's empty.
Oh man! Poor kiddo- it's amazing kids live to be adults. I swear! Looks like he was a major trooper though... glad he's doing better. (Glad you're doing better too- I've learned that these things are much more traumatizing for us moms than they are for the kids!)
Oh how I love your little man. I have some pics that I will email you. I am glad that he is better. You are not the first or the last mommy to herchoo their kid. Have I told you about the glue bottle I dropped on Syd's eye? The kind with the sharp orange tip? Or the time Brynn fell out of her carrier at church and rolled down the isle? Or when I let Claire fall down the stairs? I could keep going.
What a cutie. Do you need to send him to my house?? For safe keeping??? Just kidding. I think he'd have worse issues here. I try so hard to keep bruises off Macie's head, but it's just so big and heavy it tips her over so easy. :) Love the pictures!
What can I say, it happens to the best of us. And for you to have made it this long in James' life without inflicting pain upon him UN-intentionally...I say you must be one of the bestest :)
I too noticed the bra right away. It would probably look cooler with dinosaurs printed on it. They are all the fashion for slings these days.
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